


He would not.

by Pomelofangirl



Series: Exploration [1]
Category: Free!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-20
Updated: 2015-06-20
Packaged: 2018-04-05 08:46:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4173465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pomelofangirl/pseuds/Pomelofangirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jealous - resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another's success or advantage itself.</p>
<p>Haruka is jealous of ghosts in Rin's life and that is pathetic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He would not.

**Author's Note:**

> Ya'll think that jealousy is cute and quirky, but it is in fact not and I don't believe that Haruka is jealous of Rin 100% of the time.
> 
> Thus this fic.
> 
> I think the style is a bit different it's probably incomplete in some way, so concrit is hella appreciated thx.
> 
> Do I ever give my fic to a beta? No. This one is not an exeption.

It was not that Haruka was jealous of Rin.

Rin who, last year was lost and now found his way.  
Rin who had friends and whom everybody liked the instant they talked to him.

Rin was important to Haru, and Haru was important to Rin.  
Or so he wanted to think.

He wanted to believe that to Rin, he is an irreplaceable friend.

But Rin has a lot of friends, right?

Sometimes, back when Rin wasn't a captain yet, and they had frequent sleepovers, Rin liked to talk about his feelings.

It included everything. The regrets he had, the regrets he has, and the regrets yet to come. Whether he gets scouted.

One of such nights, Rin talked about his friends.

Haruka knew that Rin had other friends than him, and the Iwatobi swim club team. He heard in middle school how the boys who attended Sano described Rin as if they knew him.

Then, Haruka took a guess to how Rin might behave and that's why he agreed to whatever his friends said about Rin. But Haruka didn't really know Rin, back then. 

„You know Haru? Sometimes I really regret that I stopped talking to Sousuke.”

„I mean you know, it was back in Australia and I didn't keep in touch with anybody but... Sousuke is a really important friend to me. Like... you know I really miss him sometimes but he moved now and I really don't have any way to contact him. And I’d really like to regain the friendship I once had with him.”

Yamazaki Sousuke. 

Rin's best friend from childhood. The one friend that is more important than Haru ever will be. The one who will always know Rin better than Haru ever will because getting to know each other requires effort and yes, Haru might have been saved by the relay and might be opening up more, but Haru still is Haru and Rin has to second guess what he means and Rin can't read him as well as Makoto is able to.

And it is bad, Haru knows that this is bad this jealousy thing, because Rin wouldn't be jealous of Makoto. So why is he so jealous of Yamazaki?

And Haru might hurt Rin again without knowing it.

But Haru has a feeling that Yamazaki Sousuke wouldn't.

Yes, Yamazaki Sousuke would never make Rin cry.

Rin also talked about his other friends from Sano and how he'd like to meet them again sometime.  
„But then I have a feeling that they already forgot about me, you know? It is like that when you don't keep in touch with them for years I guess.” there was some hint of sadness and nostalgia to his voice and it was 2 am and Haru should be asleep probably. Rin surely thinks he is asleep and is not listening to his ramblings.

Because why would Rin talk about such things in the middle of the night? And _only_ in the middle of the night?

Haru did his best to fall asleep and not listen so he feigned a light snore. He decided to not listen to whatever else Rin has to say because it might hurt too much.

Rin looked at him and chuckled a bit.

„I am still incredibly lucky to have you Haru. Really. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't be where I am today.”

If they were sleeping in the same bed, Rin would surely hug him now and whisper goodnight into Haru's ear and Haru would be more awake than ever.

But Rin was sleeping on the futon and Haru on his bed. Rin was really falling asleep and Haru was there, awake, jealous of people that were Rin's friends in the past. Not appreciating that they are just that, Rin's friends in the past, and here he is in the present being Rin's friend and one of the most important people in his life.

Haruka is jealous of ghosts in Rin's life and that is pathetic.

He is jealous of them leaving an impression on Rin after this much time passed, because here is he, Haruka Nanase just a lucky twist of fate that is replaceable. Here at 2.15 am he thinks about how much better Yamazaki Sousuke is than him, and that if Yamazaki had run into Rin that one December day, he wouldn't make Rin cry.


End file.
